the boobies....

Posted: 3/14/2014

For a woman who is supposedly kinda smart I am quite the dumbass in the boobie department. Every single morning of my life I get up and scrounge around in my drawers looking for something to hold up the girls and what I find is just this side of tragic.

There are old cheap jogging bras. Bras that are too small. Bras that I'm certain may not make it past a good bounce. Bras that would make the Bali company weep in shame.

Stay with me here. This lack of a good, or evenly mildly decent bra, has me thinking lately about what we really should and shouldn't regret. When I think about loss and regret and all that stuff we all have what rises to the top these days is the sad fact that I've never been properly fitted for a bra.

Hell, yes, I've made mistakes. Relationships and jobs and parenting and being unable to keep my big mouth shut at the proper moment and turning left instead of right but there's something to be said for what is done is done. You know? At some point we have to think about important things like our breasts and how we spent most of our lives buying soccer shoes and paying for college tuition and taking care of other people while the girls started heading south.

I'm not one to brush off emotional or tragic losses. We all have them and it's part of life....and not necessarily a bad part because that stuff gives us so much growth. But let it go. Think about your breasts for crying out loud!

I'm not rushing off to Macy's or wherever they do things like bra-fittings just yet because I've got a mess of crap stacked up here I need to take care of first. I don't even have a kitchen table these days but I've started a new regret list. I should actually title it..."I want...". So if I go after it I will never regret....which we have just decided is, after a certain point, just a waste of time.

And time is a pretty big deal when the girls are getting a bit lazy and want to rest on my stomach most of the time...which is another issue entirely.

But screw that too. I'm going to have a donut, some chips, and a glass of wine and visualize owning a bra with wire that could also double as a weapon. 



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