a make believe day of honesty...

Posted: 3/7/2014

Have you ever wished for one of those days when you could be really, really honest with everyone in and around your world? I am thinking the answer is yes.

Sometimes at my other job, the one where I fill wine glasses and talk of my writing, we think about how much fun it would be to have Rude Day. "Sit down and shut up. We'll get to you as soon as we can." "No, you cannot use our bathroom. Hold it." "You are a jackass who can't be pleased so go someplace and drink beer now."

I'm sure you get the point. I know there are places like this because my friend Sarah told me about how the waitresses in one  joint almost made her cry until she looked up and saw the, "This is the Rude Bar sign."

So we've all been hurt and abandoned and had terrible things happen to us and sometimes it just isn't right or doesn't feel right to tell the other people involved. There are a variety of reasons for this and if you were raised Catholic like I was(I remain in recovery) you just don't want to make yourself feel better by exposing a fault or by crossing a line or by telling the person you are on to them and they are  an idiot....or something worse. I think they call this social grace.

It would be wonderful if people were all just nice. It would also be wonderful if people were all just honest. Here's what I've learned about hurt feelings and being betrayed and taken advange of and lied to. Yes—that's me up there preaching. In the end we are all responsible for our own feelings and it's best to be true to who you are and what you know in your own heart. Oh, hell I know I've hurt people and made mistakes but I must say that I strive to be true and real and letting go of all the shit that people try to pass onto us is a really great feeling. Also if you just look this person in the eye for a few seconds they will know you have them figured out. A wink helps too.

One of the messages I try to incorporate into every book I write is the true fact that holding on to "stuff" keeps us in one place. Forgiveness is another deal and it's a bit overrated sometimes(isn't that something?). We'll get to that frightful issue one of these days.

So for now I say seek out true and real hearts and be one yourself. Then come see me cause I love you already and you will know who I am because my heart is right there on the edge of my sleeve.

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